The Secrets of Long Distance Relationship Success

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Online dating drastically increases your chances of finding a soul mate because it allows you to mingle with singles all over the country and world. But with that comes one of the major downsides of online dating, too: long distance relationships.

While it’s not a good move to limit oneself to local singles, long distance loving isn’t for everyone; it requires patience, self-discipline, trust, and the ability to set and stick to a few ground rules. If you learn how to communicate well with your partner and stick to your guns, your long distance relationship has the potential to flourish. Here are some secrets to building a strong, successful relationship that transcends distance.

Write Letters

Although you might be used to sending emails and instant messages, it’s also a good idea to bust out the old quill and scroll every once and a while to write letters by hand. In fact, according to studies, couples in long distance relationships who write letters to each other are twice as likely to stay together. Writing out your thoughts and feelings will also get your creative juices flowing and help you express yourself more authentically.

Let’s Get It On

You can’t have real sex unless you see each other in person, but that doesn’t mean you have to sacrifice intimacy altogether. From writing each other erotic emails to doing the deed over the phone with a hands-free headset, do it however you can and do it often. Maintaining some semblance of a sex life, albeit virtual, will also make getting intimate in person all the more titillating.

Maintain Your Independence

If you meet someone online and fall in love with them instantly, do not throw away your life and move across the country to live with them. That will make you look nutty and desperate, and it could end up being the biggest mistake of your life. Take things slowly and get to know each other well from a distance before thinking of making any drastic moves.

Set Ground Rules

The reason why many long distance relationships fail is because the couples don’t set any ground rules. If you want an LDR to work, you have to create a plan and stand firmly on it. Commit to talking to each other at a certain time every day and determine how many times a year you’re going to see each other (try to see each other in person at least once per month).

The most important issue to discuss is this: will you be a monogamous couple or are you allowed to see other people? Make sure that you’re both perfectly clear on where you stand in the relationship so that you both have the same expectations.

Take a Day off Each Month

Although you should chat every day, if possible, you should also consider taking one day off from each other each month. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, so if you don’t talk for a day, you will start to miss each other even more and the intensity of your affection will grow. Try it!

Set up Dates

You may not be able to see each other every weekend, but that doesn’t have to stop you from doing stuff together. If you want to hang out on a Friday night, why not plan to go see the same movie at the same time in your respective cities? You won’t be able to cuddle together and eat from the same bucket of popcorn while watching the flick, but it’ll be comforting to know that your lover is doing the exact same thing as you at the same time. And after it’s over, you can go home, get on the phone with each other, and discuss your thoughts about the movie.

Stay Positive

The most important component of any long distance relationship is positivity. If you’re feeling grumpy, don’t let that interfere with your nightly conversations together. Try not to sweat the small stuff and avoid discussing your frustrations about being far apart because you could fall into an endless cycle of negativity. Long distance relationships are difficult as it is, so your relationship will inevitably suffer if you don’t maintain the good vibes.